The Day Vesuvius Erupted… By Ellie

It all started when me and my friend were hurling juicy, smooth olives at each other. All seemed a normal day in my home town, the gorgeous Pompeii…

Me and my friend Clio had beaming smiles on our faces as we raced each other to the top of the steep hill. We drew at the race. When we got to the top we fell on the floor in a flurry of laughter and panting. We then started to roll around. Unexpectedly, we heard a crash as loud as a sonic boom. “What was it?” we thought.

Next we saw grey ash and black smoke billowing out of the top of Vesuvius. I was sure it was erupting although I didn’t want to believe it! I could feel tears welling in my eyes. I took a glance over at Clio to see she was sobbing already. We had to get down Vesuvius! We started to sprint as fast as our legs could carry us down Vesuvius.

We both burst into my mums house screaming and panting. I warned her that we had to go to the boat deck. As we went to the boat deck, we started to clamber into the cart like a herd of elephants. All our faces were full of horror. We whipped the horses to set off.

Soon we arrived at the chilly, gigantic harbor. We all pushed and shoved each other onto a boat and soon we were far out at sea. Pompeii was just a tiny dot in the distance. But the question was, where were we going to go?

Comments
  • hayley says:

    well done keep the work up.

  • Ellie says:

    By the way, if Miss Young approves,hint hint! I will write a few more paragraphs so you can know what happens. Would you like that? XX

    • Miss Young says:

      Ellie, you can definitely write more paragraphs – I want to find out what happens next too :)

      Miss Young

    • Ms. Keptner says:

      Excellent narrative, Ellie! I am a middle school teacher in the US, and I love the idea of having my students write a fictional account of a historical event. Wonderful use of really precise vocabulary words to describe both actions and emotions. This is a cliffhanger; please share more!

  • Ellie says:

    Thank you all! I am very proud of my writing myself! I really enjoyed writing it!

  • Alex says:

    I feel like I am going to fall of my seat I love your similes

  • Mrs Kiel says:

    Your words made we want to keep reading and reading. You have a real gift for storytelling.

  • Miss Ingham says:

    I’m on the edge of my seat Ellie, wanting to know what is going to happen next!

  • Mrs. Lustgraaf says:

    Wonderful use of adjectives and sensory words!

  • Mrs Sarginson says:

    I enjoyed reading your description Ellie! I hope your characters stay safe so we can read what happens next.

  • Miss Preston says:

    Wow Ellie! This is a fantastic piece of writing. I love the use of similes- and I really want to find out where your characters are going to go.